Category Archives: DIY RPG Productions

Gathox Quake Alley Mayhem- Now Available as POD!

GVS2 master cover art

Gathox Vertical Slum‘s first official adventure, Quake Alley Mayhem is now available for print on demand!

Also- don’t forget the character sheet is available for free!

 

Note: If you have already  purchased the PDF on Drivethru, I will be sending you a link, via the email you’ve provided to Drivethru, so you can purchase the POD at the bundle price, if you’re interested!

Here’s a killer video David Lewis Johnson did for his book!

This is a fantastic module that has received several great reviews already!

QUOTES FROM REVIEWS
“The thing I really dig about this module, is there are no rooms in it that are empty.  Every room has a chance for roleplay, a fight, and or a deadly trap.  In other words this isn’t a vanilla dungeon with safe words!” – Shane Ward, 3 Toadstools Publishing
“If you enjoyed Gathox Vertical Slum then you need to get this product. Quake Alley Mayhem is a fun adventure to unleash at a con to show people how wild and crazy adventuring in Gathox can be.” – Brutorz Bill, Green Skeleton Gaming Guild
“The gonzo setting and weird gangs gives the whole enterprise a Heavy Metal magazine feel, or at least a Heavy Metal gloss on a grindhouse film. It’s a very fitting approach and a strong answer to the question “what do you do with Gathox?”” – Trey Causey, From the Sorcerer’s Skull
“Quake Alley Mayhem is compact and punchy. Every room in the dungeon contains something of interest, such as a trap, puzzle, enemy, or all of the above. As was the case with Gathox Vertical Slum, the writing quality is descriptive without being verbose, and appropriately weird for the setting. The artwork is sketchy, grimy, and punk as hell – perfect for the tone of the book. There’s just enough to get the imagination flowing without feeling like it’s just there to take up space between the text sections. Overall, the quality of the book, both writing and illustration, is top notch, and there’s enough to feel substantial for a small tournament module.” – Jesse Goldshear, Yenemvelt: Another World
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TIME IS RUNNING OUT! Demon City Kickstarter is Almost Done- Oh and An Actual Play Podcast!

We are in the final forty eight hours of the Kickstarter!!

First- Zak got together with Red Moon Roleplaying and ran some Demon City for them!  Wanna scope it?  Here you be!

Second- The Demon City Kickstarter is winding down!  There is still time to hope on this sexy freight train!

Still curious as to why supporting Demon City is a great idea…?

Do you like books that have great art?

Do you like books that have fantastic writing?

Do you like horror?

Do you puppies?  Well good for you- that really has nothing to do with the KS, but I just wanted to make sure.

Do you like sexy layout that is exciting, fresh, and clean?

Here is a few other reasons:

New Images

DC_Part4_Revenant_v4

DC_Part4_Psychic_v4DC_Part4_Vampire_v4

 

Previously Shared Images

DC_Part4_Demon6thOrder_v4DC_Part4_FoetalGod_v4DC_Part4_ChokingGhost_v4DC_Part4_Lycanthrope_v4DC_Part1_Motives_v4aDC_Part4_Demon3rdOrder_v4DC_Part4_HungryGhost_v4

DC_Part1_ActionChart_v4 (1)

 


The First Gathox Vertical Slum Module is Out! Beware of QUAKE ALLEY MAYHEM!!

David Lewis Johnson put on his mad cap and turned the metal up to 11 for the first module for Gathox Vertical Slum through DIY RPG Productions!

Fuck he even did a video!

Oh and I did a blood ritual and was summoned the talented and snuggly Matt Hildebrand to shred out the layout on this beast!

And lo’ there was QUAKE ALLEY MAYHEM!

Note: Currently the book is only available in PDF form.  We are waiting to hear back on the recent submission to OBS.  Anyone who purchases the PDF will receive an email through Drivethru with the option to get the POD at the bundle price when its released!

GVS2 master cover art.png

 

Here’s a lil info on the adventure!

Enter a seedy underworld of alien hyper-capitalists and wondrous ancient artifacts with Quake Alley Mayhem! 
This murderous, misshapen module foists a host of traps, puzzles, and environmental hazards upon unsuspecting players in a race against time. Structured for both tournament and campaign play, Quake Alley Mayhem! includes pregenerated characters, supplements to track the party’s progress and impending doom, and hooks to fit the adventure into a larger campaign.Designed for 3 to 6 players of levels 1 – 3 for Gathox Vertical Slum.

 
QUOTES FROM REVIEWS
“The thing I really dig about this module, is there are no rooms in it that are empty.  Every room has a chance for roleplay, a fight, and or a deadly trap.  In other words this isn’t a vanilla dungeon with safe words!” – Shane Ward, 3 Toadstools Publishing
“If you enjoyed Gathox Vertical Slum then you need to get this product. Quake Alley Mayhem is a fun adventure to unleash at a con to show people how wild and crazy adventuring in Gathox can be.” – Brutorz Bill, Green Skeleton Gaming Guild
“The gonzo setting and weird gangs gives the whole enterprise a Heavy Metal magazine feel, or at least a Heavy Metal gloss on a grindhouse film. It’s a very fitting approach and a strong answer to the question “what do you do with Gathox?”” – Trey Causey, From the Sorcerer’s Skull
“Quake Alley Mayhem is compact and punchy. Every room in the dungeon contains something of interest, such as a trap, puzzle, enemy, or all of the above. As was the case with Gathox Vertical Slum, the writing quality is descriptive without being verbose, and appropriately weird for the setting. The artwork is sketchy, grimy, and punk as hell – perfect for the tone of the book. There’s just enough to get the imagination flowing without feeling like it’s just there to take up space between the text sections. Overall, the quality of the book, both writing and illustration, is top notch, and there’s enough to feel substantial for a small tournament module.” – Jesse Goldshear, Yenemvelt: Another World
Let’s see some tasty layout and art!
GVS_QuakeAlleyMayhem_10-11
GVS_QuakeAlleyMayhem_9
GVS_QuakeAlleyMayhem_20
GVS_QuakeAlleyMayhem_16-17a
Oh and we have a character sheet on Drivethru as well!
GVS2 character sheet

Barbarians of the Ruined Earth- Session Three- The Fight for the Dark Orb, Part 1

Last session our group aided a village of frog beastmen, called The Gulpmongers, who were being attacked by raiders wearing strange mirror-like armor and wielding similar weapons.  After many explosions, use of Weaponized Animals, and some spell slinging the band of heroes were successful and were given a glowing white orb as a reward.  The orb was a key piece to contacting the Cosmic Being, The Luminescent Mother.

We now continue our adventures with the group setting off for the failed human settlement, Laundr-O-Mat to the far west in hopes of finding the Dark Orb.

Players

Omar- “Tip Toe” Tyron Thompson- Scavenger

Shoe- Medallion- Armadite

Coley- Coleesi- Barbarian

Brian- Sok- Armadillo Beastman

John- Vinsmoke the Sorcerer (Alt Casting Rules)

Unable to Attend

Gene- Beastman

Liam- Ashak- Death Priest

Kane- Vyvyan- Barbarian

Fletch- Shaw Shir- Vek

Introducing Some New Peeps

Several of my normal group members couldn’t make this session, so I opened up seats on my G+ Community page and got a few peeps interested.

Aside: Feel free to request an invite to the community page- I post quite a bit there that doesn’t make it to my blog as I don’t feel it warrants a full post- including possible game times, etc.  

I caught Shoe, Coley, and Bryan up to speed with the events of the two previous sessions and described that they were once a band of five that had heard of a treasure trove to the southern edge of the swamps… unable to resist adventure (and treasure) the band made their way down there…  what they found instead was a four-story high crocodile with robotic limbs and laser beam eyes.  Two of the group were vaporized, chomped and splatted before the three could escape.

Croconator

Behold the Croconator- not quite what I’ll have commissioned, but close enough:D

They wandered the swamps for days before coming across the small village of Mardi Grass where they were healed and fed.  Feeling a sense of reciprocity, the three agreed to help Vinsmoke and “Tip Toe” on their quest.

With that out of the way, the band bought some needed supplies and we began.

Before they left, Shoe went romping through the area and found a wild rabbit and befriended it, taking it with her.

Through the Swamps

The group of heroes began moving slowly through the soggy swamps of Ancient Earth Louisiana, heading west towards their objective.  After traveling for about five hours on the first day the sounds of screaming met their ears.

Me: “What do you do?”

Omar: I find the nearest bush and hide.”

Omar

Coley: “I shout, ‘shut the fuck up!'”

Shoe: “I run towards the noise as quickly as possible!”  She throws her rabbit to Sok (Bryan)- “Make sure nothing happens to my rabbit!”

Bryan: “I go after Medallion (Shoe) and tuck the rabbit into my shirt.”

John: “As this isn’t my fight, I slowly walk up to the noise.”

Medallion crashes through a clearing and finds a large pond of disgusting gray mud.  At the bank is a woman splashing in the mud, submerged to her stomach, “Help me!  Help!” she screams, flailing around.

Medallion heroically leapt down and grabbed the woman by her arms as Sok, Vinsmoke, and Coleesi move into the clearing.  The flailing woman went limp in Medallion’s hands, her had splattering in the mud.  The muck around the woman began to bubble and a two-story massive crab emerged from the fetid waters, the woman rising with it.  The woman was connected at the torso to the creature, limp and lifeless- a weird sucking noise sounded as the woman’s figure was recalled into a sphincter atop the crab’s head.

Aside: This encounter came from a dream I had. When I described the woman retreating into a sphincter and it pulsating constantly, I got a good couple groans outta folks.  Life is good.

The fight went really well.  Vinsmoke got himself pinchered by the crab and was rendered unconscious.  “Tip Toe” hid behind a tree and then began firing his bow at the creature.  Coleesi used her bow as well and Medallion hacked away at the crab, also utilizing her four armed attack.

Hats off to Bryan for using the beastman Super Strong mechanic in full awesomeness in this fight.  He described Sok climbing a tree and using his tail to break it and fling it on the crab (he succeeded on his attack and rolled 2d10 damage!).

The crab was felled by an arrow (either Omar or Coley) and Sok butchered some meet before the group moved on.

The group encountered nothing of interest on the third day.  On the fourth day the group was startled when grey snow flakes started to fall from the sky.  The snow did not melt in hand, nor was it ash.  As the group traveled Sok and Medallion became morose.  On the fifth day Sok and Vinsmoke where brought down, feeling great depression.

They pressed through the swamps, the grey snow weighing heavily on their souls, when the dilapidated remains of an Ancient Earth strip mall came into view.  At the border a rickety wooden sign, clearly of modern make, covered in sloppily painted letters, “Welcome to Laundr-O-Mat.

 

 

To be Continued


Barbarians of the Ruined Earth Just Got Itself a Cover (and a Character Sheet too)

BotRE_Cover_WIP_v5

Matt Hildebrand knocked this motherfucker out of the park!  I really appreciate all his hard work on the whole project!  Matt and I really wanted to convey that Thundarr the Barbarian-type feeling with this and he nailed it!

Barbarians of the Ruined Earth is a fantasy post-apocalyptic setting inspired by Thundarr the Barbarian, Pirates of Dark Water, Mad Max, etc.  It uses a modified version of The Black Hack rules. KICKSTARTER COMING IN THE NEAR FUTURE!!

Matt also designed an awesome character sheet for BotRE!

Here’s the PDF version: BotRE_CharacterSheet_color_v3

BotRE_CharacterSheet_color_pg1BotRE_CharacterSheet_color_pg2

 


Barbarians of the Ruined Earth- Session Two- The Plight of the Gulpmongers

This adventure our group continues their adventure towards the town of Stinky Peat, all believing they are seeking answers on how to defeat the Chimera, but are really traveling to the town so Ashak, who lied to them about what the spirits told him, so he can try the best burger in the swamp.

 

Players

Liam- Ashak- Death Priest

Omar- “Tip Toe” Tyron Thompson- Scavenger

Fletch- Shaw Shir- Vek

Kane- Vyvyan- Barbarian

John- Vinsmoke the Sorcerer (Alt Casting Rules)

Unable to Attend

Gene- Beastman

Barbarian

Kane did this in photoshop.  Inspired by the Young Ones show

 

I’ll I Want is a Stupid Burger

The session begins with the group about to cross the land bridge of Lake Pontchartrain so they can quickly get to Stinky Peat.  As the group set foot on the bridge, the sounds of bodies landing on rusted cars, water splashing, and croaking greeted their ears.

Gulpmongers

The group turned to see 10 frog beastmen had appeared from the waters of the lake, surrounding them.  The frogmen had spears and swords made of wood, bone, and stone.  Some had weapons fashioned from Ancient Earth rubbish.  The heroes drew their weapons, ready to do battle when a deep croaking voice cried out, “Wait…  Do you mean us harm?”

Vyvyan, afraid of nothing, said, “No.  We are on our way to Stinky Peat and needed to use this bridge.  Is it yours?”

“Yes.” Replied the croaking voice.  A large brown hand splashed out of the water, followed by another, then the huge squat head and rotund body of a 10‘ tall toad man lifted from the waters.  Finally, the creature pulled all of itself from the water and landed with a thud on the crumbling concrete.

“The bridge is part of our village.  We are call themselves Gulpmongers.” The toad beastman issued a warbling croak, echoed by the frog beastman.  “I am Mog.  Chief of my people.”

Mog

“You look like you can handle yourselves in a fight.  Might yo–”

“Well that’s debatable.” Said Vinsmoke.

Mog cleaned his throat, “Might  you listen to our plight?”

Mog explain the Gulpmongers have been hunted by a band of raiders.   In the past, the Gulpmongers have always been able to stand toe to toe with the raiders, suffering only minor losses, but since the band moved into an Ancient Earth factory to the southwest of the lake, the Gulpmongers haven’t stood a chance.

“These humans have found new and powerful weaponry and armor.  All of it looks like mirrors.  All our stone arrows and spears bounce off of them uselessly.  Their sharp jagged swords pierce our flesh, and they take my people to be slaughtered or enslaved.”

“If we help you…  what’s in it for us?” Asks the barbarian.

“We have something that will very much interest the village of Mardi Grass and its peoples.  We have an orb that we believe belongs to the Luminescent Mother, a being I believe you all worship.  If you help us, I will give this strange object to you.  It will be considered a symbol of friendship with the Gulpmongers.”

“Annnnnddd some coin?”

The chief looked irritated, “And 500 ceramic coins.  They are white, minted by sorcery of Tygham the Fearless- ruler of the Swamps.”

The group agreed and Mog sweetened the pot by giving the group two Gulpmonger warriors to accompany them.

With that the group turned around and headed to the base of the raiders.

Best Laid Plans + Impatient Banging on Front Door/Bad Rolls = Pain, Bleeding, and Crying

The group made it to the factory, a rectangular two-story building, without incident and saw three raiders outside, moving around patrolling.  All three of the raiders were dispatched quickly, but not exactly quietly.  As the band of heroes approached the front door another raider opened it to see what was going on.   Seeing the heroes walking up the raider shouted, “Oh shit!” and slammed the door.

Vyvyan walked confidently up and banged on the door.  The group then hatched a plan.  Vinsmoke would open the door and Vyvyan would toss in an exploding hedgehog (see below) and that would take care of any raiders laying a trap for them.

This part of the plan went of perfectly.  Vinsmoke opened the door, revealing the faces of three shocked raiders and Vyvyan tossed in this cute lil soon to be exploded hedgehog and shut the door.  An explosion shook the building.

Explosive Hedgehog: These small hedgehogs are flung at a target from a sling.  When they strike, they explode, dealing Class damage to the target.  The explosion is powerful enough to destroy thin wooden walls.

At this point this is when things started to kinda go downhill.  Now COMPLETELY aware of intruders, the raiders fortified their positions and made it harder for them to be killed.  The second in charge, Mr. Mustachio, threw an explosive hedgehog at the group.  Vinsmoke had held his action and acted by casting a spell enveloping the creature and tried to fling it back at the group… and he rolled a 1…  So the hedgehog bounced against the door and landed at their feet… and John rolled a 10 on damage.  BOOM.

Mustachio

Captain Mustachio is gone, but not forgotten!

The group was hurting and barely maintaining from that point on (they also lost their NPC Gulpmongers, attack dogs, and warriors from Mardi Grass).  They all hunkered in a room for an hour, rested, and got a few HP back.

The group took some time to look around the group saw some of the mirror armor and weaponry that the Gulpmongers had described.  The group took a few pieces and set off downstairs.

The sound of a large squeaky wheel echoing off the walls.  The group saw a huge hamster wheel, on it was a rotting undead giant rat (this was Liam’s idea from the collaborative world-building).  The wheel was sparking sickly greenish-yellow electric bolts that traveled along transistors.  Eventually, when enough energy was built up, a loud hum filled the room and with a whoosh the energy traveled down wiring under the ground.

As the group looked around, the leader of the raiders, a dastardly hillbilly Scavenger, 2nd level, lurked in the shadows while the group descended into a large basement. With him were two undead giant rats and his son, a wet-behind-the-ears-raider.

The fight was hard, but not as hard as it could have been.  Ashak used his curse ability and against the leader, causing him to lose several rounds of action.

Curse: The Death Priest must succeed a WIS test to curse a living target. The target is cursed for 1 hour. Each time the character must make a decision roll 1d8: 1-4) do nothing; 5) act normally; 6) attack ally) 7) flee for 1d4 rounds (do not roll during this time); 8) attack self.

When the leader finally acted, he pulled a jagged mirror blade from a scabbard and released a volley of shards of glass at the group, causing heavy damage.  The group pelted the leader with arrows, shotgun blasts, magic, and swords- most of which, even when paralyzed, bounced of off him harmlessly.

“Fools!  This armor and sword were a gift from Shanton, the Sorcerer of Mirrors, for my loyalty!  I cannot be beaten by the likes of  you!”

Eventually he was.  Vyvyan took the sword and someone else took the armor (can’t remember who though).

With the raiders broken, the group made their way back to the Gulpmonger village, retrieved their reward of 400 ceramic coins and the glowing orb.  The group decided, considering how battered and blood they were, to head back to Mardi Grass to recoup.

When the group arrived there was concern at their return and bloodied appearance.  Vinsmoke offered an explanation as the group made their way to the shrine of the Luminescent Mother.  Vyvyan placed the orb in the statue’s hands.  The hands of the statue closed on the orb, then parted.  The orb in the statue’s right hand, the left open and empty.  The statues left eye will glow yellow like the orb.  The right blank stone.

L Mother

The group heard a voice echo softly on the wind.

“You are close.  For I am one- yet two.  You have found the Light Orb.  It is life, love, and health.  Yet I am missing the Dark Orb.  It is death, anger, and decay.   I am the cycle, the beginning and the end.  Find the Dark Orb and I will grant you a gift.”

The group asked if the Luminescent Mother knew where the orb was.

“I sense the Dark Orb lies forgotten in the ruins of a human settlement to the West.”

The group knew of talk of such a village… the ruins of the village Laundr-o-Mat to the west.

This is where we ended for the evening.

Next session the group now has several plot hooks to decide on.  Will the group continue to Stinky Peat to find the best damned burger in the swamps?  Will they attempt to find the Dark Orb in the rancid haunted ruins of Laundr-o-Mat?  Or will they seek information on this Sorcerer of Mirrors?

Find out next time on:

BotRE Logo!


Barbarians of the Ruined Earth- Session One- Attack of the Chimera

Aside: I’ve been rewatching Thundarr the Barbarian recently, analyzing the episode structure- this is for a future BotRE book- and jotting down notes on the various locations, monsters, goals, etc.  So many episodes will have enemies that are flying robots, molten magma men, mutant overseers, sorcerers, etc… In an episode I just watched called Wizard Wars (awesome episode) cracked me up, because one of the enemies… midgets- yep there is no getting around that these are the rejects from the lollipop guild…

Sand People

Oh sure they call them “Sand People”… but you know…  You know who and what they are.

 

Anyways- enough of that…

Last session the group finished the creative world building and we decided we would start in the town called Mardi Grass close to the ruins of New Orleans.

Here’s the town map:

Mardi Grass Town Map

And here’s a map of the surrounding area:

BotRE Map (1)

Session 1- There’s Trouble Brewing

Note: I will put all creature stats at the end of the recap.  If the monster has a “*” in front of its name, then it will be in the BotRE book, otherwise I created it specifically for the session.  

Players

Liam- Ashak- Death Priest

Omar- “Tip Toe” Tyron Thompson- Scavenger

John- Vinsmoke the Sorcerer (Alt Casting Rules)

Unable to Attend

Fletch- Shaw Shir- Vek

Gene- Beastman

The session started with the group slogging through the swamp with Mama Cleo.  Several days ago hunters from Mardi Grass spotted a large chunk of the moon, that had crashed nearby during the calamity, was glowing red.  Mama Cleo took the group, especially the Sorcerer Vinsmoke and her disciple, Ashak, to investigate.  She was worried about this strange omen- the moon rock only glows prior to the arrival of the Chimera, once every 30 years.  It’s not supposed to glow fir another 10 years.

Mama Cleo explained the situation, “the last time the Chimera showed up, I was a young woman- just understanding my gifts…  the Chimera is a fearsome beast; we believe it was once a man, but now corrupted and ferocious.  It has the head of a man, with long mandibles like a beetle, large leathery bat wings, the body of a bear, with the legs of a massive boar, snakes for arms, and a tail that shoots flames from Hell. Every 30 years it descends from the sky and snags some of our kin and then leaves to feast and slumber.  We are powerless to stop it.  Of course the brave, and ultimately foolish, warriors have left to track it to its lair.  None have returned.”

Eventually the group came through the clearing and found the huge chunk of rock glowing vibrantly red.  As the group got closer, the moon rock hummed and pulsed for a brief second before red lightning arced out, a bolt struck a rusted bicycle and another a VW Bug and two washing machines (because you know it makes PERFECT sense for two washing machines and a VW Bug to be near each other in a dilapidated post-apocalyptic setting- don’t dispute me!).  A third bolt shot off through the trees.

All the rubbish struck became suffused with red light and transformed into monstrous automatons!

This fight was fun.  Both enemies resembled humanoid shapes.  The bicycle had a wheel for a head capable of disarming any who attempted to attack it (sadly no one attacked the creature with a melee weapon!- oh well, best laid plans and all that), while the car/washing machine creature was the heavy hitter.  Belching smog and its washing machine arms chugging, filled with soapy swamp water.  Once per combat it could open a washing machine and release a spout of water at a target, knocking them prone.

After two rounds a scream issued somewhere beyond the trees.  Vinsmoke looked around and saw Fiona, the daughter of his friend Cobb, pressed against a tree, recoiled in terror from a similar monster to the ones they faced- a bunch of garbage joined together, resembling a hideous inchworm-like creature, towards her.  The head of the monster a large old oak trunk, snapping hungrily.   Vinsmoke immediately left the group to fight the bike and car monsters so he could go to Fiona’s aid.  He used his magic to summon spikes up from the muddy ground, attempting to impale the beast.  Sadly, the spikes did not pierce the creatures armor, but it lifted the trash inchworm  up, causing it to lose its balance and fall prone on the ground.  Vinsmoke got a free attack with his Sorcerer’s staff.

The fight lasted a few more rounds, but eventually the heroes were victorious.  Panting from the fight, they began to bandage their wounds, but their rest was cut short when an explosion echoed in the distance and a terrible, spine-tingling roar met their ears.  Mama Cleo stiffened, “No… The Chimera has arrived.”

The group rushed back to Mardi Grass and found it under siege of the Chimera.  Several buildings were on fire, bodies lay on the ground, unmoving.  The beast stood in the center of town, two unconscious humans limp in its snake arms.

High overhead disgusting birdlike humanoid creatures circled the scene.

The Chimera

Gorn was SUCH a fucking cool enemy in Thundarr I totally had to take inspiration from it!- From episode 17, City of Evil

Several villagers, including Nomi, leader of the small town guard, were pointing spears at the Chimera.  It lazily flapped its wings, sending a huge gust of wind out, knocking everyone over.  The Chimera opened its wings, let out another roar, and took to the skies with its freshly caught prey.

As the Chimera left the buzzard creatures sped to the ground, looking for easy prey.  The heroes  gathered themselves to protect their friends and village.

This fight was a little tough.  “Tip Toe” Tyrone Thompson had to leave at this point, so it was only Vinsmoke and Ashak.  Each had used their spells for the day.  I was nice and said they had regained their Luck abilities to cast one more spell each (I am SUCH a nice person!).

Eventually the group killed all three of the vulturefolk and the villagers started taking care of the damage inflicted by the Chimera’s attack.  Mama Cleo looked at one of the vulturefolk corpses and recognized it to be the previous town mayor.  He and his wife were ones that were taken years ago!

Ashak cast Talk With Spirits and asked the deceased mayor three questions.

Question One: What happened to you?

Answer: The Chimera put me in a hideous stinking sack and I was slowly transformed into a cruel bloodthirsty monster.

Question Two: How do we stop the Chimera?

Answer: Only magic and powerful items of Sorcery or Stupendous Science will wound the creature.

Question Three: Where can I find the best burger in the area?

Answer: There was a place in the village of Stinky Peat called Ol’ Smokey’s BBQ.  The burgers there were delicious.

After the third answer the spirit of the mayor disappeared, finally allowed to rest.

Askak turned to the village at large, “The spirit of this mayor told me how to defeat the Chimera!  The answer lies to the north in the village of Stinky Peat!

We all chuckled at his complete BS of the situation.

The current mayor, Kane, came into the scene and told the group he would send two warriors and attack dogs with them- as the terror of the Chimera must end.

Kane: Kane is known for his rambunctious spirit and ability to fight (Barbarian, 2nd level).  He has defended Mardi Grass many times.  He always carries his prized spear, The Man-Splitter- a remarkable piece of Stupendous Science with an electrified, motorized blade.  Kane constantly rubs himself with baby lotion to keep his skin moist and shiny.  He has a collection of Ancient Earth action movies and a working entertainment center.  He is obsessed with Chuck Norris and John McClain.

We ended there for the night!

MONSTERS

Car Golem

HD 2; RP 1; Fists (2d4)

Description: This massive creature was constructed from Stupendous Science and sorcery.  Several cars have been melded together to form a 12’ monstrosity.  The engines sputter and belch exhaust.

Special: Washer Fists: Once per combat, can open the washer lid and send a deluge of water at a target, knocking them prone (no save) and they suffer damage.

Smog: Once per hour can release a cloud of exhaust that blinds all in Nearby radius for 2d4 rounds.

 

Bicycle Golem

HD 1; RP 2; Fists (1d6)

Description: Bike in a humanoid form, with a wheel as a head.

Special: Spokes: When attacked with a slashing or piercing weapon, there is a chance that the weapon gets stuck in the head spokes (PC makes a Luck roll).  If it favors the monster, it’s caught in the spokes and the PC must succeed a STR save or have the weapon ripped from the grasp and flung into the swampy water.  They must spend 1d3 rounds finding it.

 

Rubbish Golem

HD 1; RP 2; Head Bash (1d6)

Description: Large trash caterpillar

Special: Swallow Whole: An attack means the target is scooped into the trunk and begins to be compressed, taking 1d6 damage per round. When target is killed the body is spit out.

*Vulturefolk

HD 1-3; RP 0-1; Claws (1d6-1d10)

Description: These fetid creatures live off the putrid meat of the dead, and prefer areas of decay to cleaner, drier climates.  While many tribes of Vulturefolk will attack humanoid settlements outright, looking for a meal, some will attempt to barter or form an uneasy alliance.  However, it doesn’t take much for a Vulturefolk to rescind their promise and still attack the settlement.

Special: Fly: Vulturefolk can fly quite fast.  While flying, ranged attacks against them are made with Disadvantage.