Real World Occupations for DCC

I plan to start running a megadungeon in the near future that is inspired by Dungeons and Dragons the Animated Series.  I knew I wanted the first session to be a funnel and have the real world “characters” have to figure out the horror that they are encountering and attempt to survive…


big customer service team
Let’s go on a team building exercise!  We can camp in those creepy woods!  What’s the worst that can happen?


Photo 5
Really Real World Occupations
Roll 1d100 Occupation Trained Weapon Trade Good
1 Academic1 Heavy text book (as club) Item that makes sense for rolled academic
2 Accountant Expensive golden pen (as dagger/knife) Hand calculator and money clip
3 Actor Award trophy (as club) Current screenplay and a copy of Stanislavski’s “An Actor Prepares”
4 Animal Trainer Taser (as sling) Yipping poodle, dog food, carrying bag, and whistle
5 Antique Dealer Bust of Beethoven (as club) History of furniture book, jug of wood polish
6 Artist2 Item that makes sense for rolled artist Item that makes sense for rolled artist
7 Athlete3 Item that makes sense for rolled athlete Item that makes sense for rolled athlete
8 Baker Rolling pin (as club) Christmas cookie cutters and mixing bowl
9 Barista Thick metal carafe (as club) 5 lb bag of dark coffee, can of non-dairy creamer
10 Bartender Knife (as dagger) Flask full of whisky, two books of matches
11 Bee Keeper Walking stick (as staff) Three jars of honey
12 Brewer Heavy mug (as club) Three growlers of beer
13 Butcher Cleaver (as axe) Thick leather apron (+1 AC)
14 Butler Leather hardback limited edition of War and Peace (as club) Tanning mirror
15 Carpenter Hammer (as club) Level and dust mask
16 Casino Dealer Brass knuckles Deck of cards and 1d100 extra dollars
17 Chef Tenderizing mallet (as club) Rack of 50 spices and recipe book
18 Clockmaker Screwdriver (as knife) Baggie of sprockets, gears, and cogs
19 College Student4 Large text book (as club) Item that makes sense for rolled student
20 Con Artist Small pistol (1d6 damage) 10 bullets, “snake oil”- make up what the next big thing is
21 Conservationist5 Survival knife and walking stick (as club) Book on history of rolled environment and challenges it faces.  All weather bedroll.
22 Construction Worker Battery operated nail gun (as sling) 100 nails, hard hat and utility belt
23 Corrections Officer Standard pistol (1d6 damage) 25 bullets, handcuffs and flashlight
24 Criminal Element6 Pistol (1d6 damage) and brass knuckles Item that makes sense for rolled criminal
25 Cyclist Old bike chain (as flail) Bicycle and helmet
26 Deep Sea Diver Harpoon gun (as bow) Diving mask, snorkel, and flippers
27 Dietician Walking stick (as staff) 10 days’ worth of healthy snacks and water packets
28 Delivery Driver Baseball bat (as club) Trucker hat and traveling dog
29 Demolitions Expert Hammer  (as club) Blasting caps, spool of copper wire
30 Dentist Scalpel (as knife) Pliers and small tin filled with teeth
31 Distiller Three small cutting knives (as dart) Bottle of strong alcohol, lighter, pack of smokes
32 Dog Walker Thick leash (as whip) Medium-sized dog
33 Doorperson Doorstop (as knife) Ball of string, whistle
34 Drag Racer Switch blade (as knife) Racing helmet, Thick leather jacket (+1 AC)
35 Electrician Utility Knife (as knife) Tool belt with pliers, hammer, and wrench
36 Emergency Medical Technician Scalpel (as knife) First aid kit (two uses- restores 1d4 HP)
37 Exterminator Crowbar (as club) Canister of toxic gas and sprayer
38 Farmer Pitchfork Pack of seeds and a hen
39 Fireman Fire axe (two-handed) Fire hat and protective suit (ignore 1 point of fire damage)
40 Fisherman Butchering knife Fishing pole and three fish hooks
41 Florist Large scissors (as knife) Glass vase and bouquet of fake flowers
42 Fry Cook Frying pan (as club) Can of cooking oil, bottle of ketchup and mustard
43 Gem Cutter Chisel (as knife) Fine gem
44 Golf Caddy 1d4 Golf clubs (as club) Caddy cart and 10 golf balls
45 Grocery Store Checker Pocket knife Backpack, box of granola bars
46 Health Inspector Heavy briefcase (as two-handed club) Clip board with notes
47 Herbalist Trowel (as knife) Packet of chamomile and packet of sage
48 High School Student4 Large text book (as club) Item that makes sense for rolled student
49 Hiker Staff Backpack, 1d4 MREs, 1 canteen
50 Home Décor Designer Rubber mallet (as club) Book of wall paper and carpet samples and measuring tape
51 Housekeeper Thick scrubbing brush with wrist-tie handle (as flail) Cleaning uniform and bottle of disinfectant
52 Hunter Hunting rifle (1d8 damage) 50 bullets, bear spray
53 IT Specialist Limited Edition “Rambo” knife Laptop with loads of porn
54 Judge Gavel (as club) Book of history of the French Revolution, impressive black “JUDGE” robes
55 Lab Tech 2d4+1 samples of gross stuff (random effects) Large clump of dry ice, small cooler
56 Lawyer Cane (as club) Lighter, fancy watch, and designer suit
57 Leatherworker Large tongs (as club) Leather armor made for Ren Fair (+2 AC)
58 Loan Shark Brass knuckles 1d100 + 20 dollars and a flashy cell phone
59 Mason Pointing trowel (as knife) Bag of 1d6 artisan crafted bricks
60 Mechanic Large monkey wrench (as club) Spark plugs, liter of 40W motor oil
61 Medium Ceremonial blade Book of spiritual signs and book of current year’s horoscopes
62 Metal Worker Thick metal tongs (as club) Large chunk of metal
63 Meteorologist Rock collection (10 rocks- as sling) A collection of “moon” rocks and “Forecasting Weather for Dummies”
64 Military Personnel Assault rifle (1d10 damage) 50 bullets, army fatigues
65 Model Small pistol (1d4 damage) 8 bullets, super sexy outfit, fancy shoes
66 Mortician Hacksaw (as knife) Embalming fluid sample, measuring tape, blood-resistant apron
67 Motel Clerk Shotgun (1d8 damage) 6 shots, book of strange occurrences across USA, flask with vodka
68 Musician7 Knife Musical instrument of rolled musician
69 Optician Iron (as club) Great pair of designer glasses, traveling eye exam kit
70 Performer8 Item that makes sense for rolled performer Item that makes sense for rolled performer
71 Photographer Tripod (as club) Camera and camera bag
72 Physician Expensive stethoscope (as garrote- 1d4 damage) Pain killers and booze
73 Pilot Flare gun (4 shots, 1d4 damage) Aviator sunglasses, pilots cap
74 Plumber Large monkey wrench (as club) Galoshes and water-resistant pants
75 Police Officer Pistol (1d6 damage) Handcuffs and badge
76 Post Person (Mail) Taser (as sling) Binder of undelivered love letters
77 Private Investigator Revolver (1d6 damage) Cool trench coat, pack of smokes, lighter
78 Psychologist Briefcase (as club) Hawaiian shirt and swimming trunks
79 Radio DJ Book of cds (1d100 cds- as sling) Headphones and old discman
80 Registered Nurse Taser (as sling) First aid kit (two uses- restores 1d4 HP)
81 Religious Leader/Occultist Silver dagger Religious symbol and holy book
82 Restaurant Owner Pizza cutter (as knife) 1d100 dollars golden ring with tiny diamonds
83 Sailor Butcher hook (as knife) Compass and HAM
84 Salesperson Heavy, large sales catalog (as club) Large suitcase with fine jewelry
85 Salvager Shotgun (1d8 damage) Map to location of lost WWII plane, compass
86 Secretary Letter opener (as knife) Fun summer clothing, nice watch
87 Security Guard Collapsible baton Pepper spray
88 Singer9 Knife 3d20 dollars and a book of new songs based on rolled genre
89 Social Worker Keychain self-defense weapon (1d4 damage) Professional clothing, comfortable shoes
90 Store Stocker Canvas bag filled with canned goods (as club) 10+1d10 canned goods and a roll of quarters ($10- for laundry)
91 Tailor Scissors (as knife) Sewing kit, 3 sets of clothing
92 Teacher10 Collapsible baton Text book on rolled subject and a stress ball
93 Train Conductor Crudgel Pocket watch and whistle
94 Treasure Hunter Pistol (1d6 damage) 25 bullets and tent and map
95 Tree Trimmer Pruning sheers (as knife) Book on tree identification and cultivation
96 Vagrant Swiss Army knife Candy bar,
97 Valet Keychain self-defense weapon (1d4 damage) Nice cell phone, designer sneakers
98 Veterinarian Scalpel (as knife) Pain killers, medium sized dog
99 Waiter Taser (as sling) Nice clothing and fanny pack
100 Writer11 Bottle of booze (as club) Laptop and carrying case


  • Academic (roll 1d8): 1) Biologist; 2) Chemist; 3) Physicist; 4) Philosophy; 5) Mythology/theology; 6) Historian; 7) Political science; 8) Geology
  • Artist (roll 1d6): 1) Jeweler; 2) Potter; 3) Painter; 4) Sculpture; 5) Illustrator; 6) Architecture
  • Athlete (roll 1d8): 1) Mountain Climbing; 2) Boxing; 3) Wrestling; 4) Track and Field; 5) Hockey; 6) Football; 7) Baseball; 8) Basketball
  • College/High School StudentMain area of study/interest– (roll 1d10): 1) Drama; 2) History; 3) Mathematics; 4) Political Science; 5) Culinary Arts; 7) Being Popular; 8) Computers; Chemistry; 9) Astronomy; 10) Band/Choir
  • Conservationisttype of environment interested in– (roll 1d8): 1) Wetlands; 2) Farmlands; 3) Desert; 4) Arctic; 5) Forests; 6) Tundra; 7) Ocean; 8) Prairie
  • Criminal Element (roll 1d8): 1) Thug; 2) Gangbanger; 3) Debt Collector; 4) Body Guard; 5) Fence; 6) Counterfeiter; 7) Information Extractor; 8) Prostitute
  • Musician (roll 1d8): 1) Guitar; 2) Drums; 3) Tuba; 4) Trumpet; 5) Bass; 6) Flute; 7) Clarinet; 8) Cow Bell
  • Performer (roll 1d8): 1) Spoken Word; 2) Mime; 3) Puppetry; 4) Freak Show; 5) Dancer (i.e., jazz/tap, ballet, swing, break, interpretive, stripper, etc.); 6) Magician; 7) Juggler; 8) Hula Hooper
  • Singer (roll 1d8): 1) Country; 2) Jazz; 3) Rock; 4) Metal; 5) Rap; 6) Pop; 7) New Wave; 8) Lounge singer
  • Teacher (roll 1d8): 1) English; 2) History; 3) Social Studies; 4) Mathematics; 5) Earth Science; 6) Physical Education; 7) Band; 8) Cooking and Home Economics
  • Writer (roll 1d8): 1) Horror; 2) Poetry; 3) Plays; 4) Fantasy/Sci-Fi; 5) Reference Manuals; 6) Children’s Books; 7) Mysteries; 8) Magazine Editorials/Journalist
Photo 6
Only the most badass survive and make it to 1st level!

Author: Mike Evans

I am the dude behind DIY RPG Productions. I have a fuck all punk rock attitude, love meeting new people, doing nature shit, and gaming (tabletop and console) and having a good time. I love craft beer (maybe too much), punk, grunge, and industrial music. I write books. Good for me.

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