I plan to start running a megadungeon in the near future that is inspired by Dungeons and Dragons the Animated Series. I knew I wanted the first session to be a funnel and have the real world “characters” have to figure out the horror that they are encountering and attempt to survive…


Really Real World Occupations | |||
Roll 1d100 | Occupation | Trained Weapon | Trade Good |
1 | Academic1 | Heavy text book (as club) | Item that makes sense for rolled academic |
2 | Accountant | Expensive golden pen (as dagger/knife) | Hand calculator and money clip |
3 | Actor | Award trophy (as club) | Current screenplay and a copy of Stanislavski’s “An Actor Prepares” |
4 | Animal Trainer | Taser (as sling) | Yipping poodle, dog food, carrying bag, and whistle |
5 | Antique Dealer | Bust of Beethoven (as club) | History of furniture book, jug of wood polish |
6 | Artist2 | Item that makes sense for rolled artist | Item that makes sense for rolled artist |
7 | Athlete3 | Item that makes sense for rolled athlete | Item that makes sense for rolled athlete |
8 | Baker | Rolling pin (as club) | Christmas cookie cutters and mixing bowl |
9 | Barista | Thick metal carafe (as club) | 5 lb bag of dark coffee, can of non-dairy creamer |
10 | Bartender | Knife (as dagger) | Flask full of whisky, two books of matches |
11 | Bee Keeper | Walking stick (as staff) | Three jars of honey |
12 | Brewer | Heavy mug (as club) | Three growlers of beer |
13 | Butcher | Cleaver (as axe) | Thick leather apron (+1 AC) |
14 | Butler | Leather hardback limited edition of War and Peace (as club) | Tanning mirror |
15 | Carpenter | Hammer (as club) | Level and dust mask |
16 | Casino Dealer | Brass knuckles | Deck of cards and 1d100 extra dollars |
17 | Chef | Tenderizing mallet (as club) | Rack of 50 spices and recipe book |
18 | Clockmaker | Screwdriver (as knife) | Baggie of sprockets, gears, and cogs |
19 | College Student4 | Large text book (as club) | Item that makes sense for rolled student |
20 | Con Artist | Small pistol (1d6 damage) | 10 bullets, “snake oil”- make up what the next big thing is |
21 | Conservationist5 | Survival knife and walking stick (as club) | Book on history of rolled environment and challenges it faces. All weather bedroll. |
22 | Construction Worker | Battery operated nail gun (as sling) | 100 nails, hard hat and utility belt |
23 | Corrections Officer | Standard pistol (1d6 damage) | 25 bullets, handcuffs and flashlight |
24 | Criminal Element6 | Pistol (1d6 damage) and brass knuckles | Item that makes sense for rolled criminal |
25 | Cyclist | Old bike chain (as flail) | Bicycle and helmet |
26 | Deep Sea Diver | Harpoon gun (as bow) | Diving mask, snorkel, and flippers |
27 | Dietician | Walking stick (as staff) | 10 days’ worth of healthy snacks and water packets |
28 | Delivery Driver | Baseball bat (as club) | Trucker hat and traveling dog |
29 | Demolitions Expert | Hammer (as club) | Blasting caps, spool of copper wire |
30 | Dentist | Scalpel (as knife) | Pliers and small tin filled with teeth |
31 | Distiller | Three small cutting knives (as dart) | Bottle of strong alcohol, lighter, pack of smokes |
32 | Dog Walker | Thick leash (as whip) | Medium-sized dog |
33 | Doorperson | Doorstop (as knife) | Ball of string, whistle |
34 | Drag Racer | Switch blade (as knife) | Racing helmet, Thick leather jacket (+1 AC) |
35 | Electrician | Utility Knife (as knife) | Tool belt with pliers, hammer, and wrench |
36 | Emergency Medical Technician | Scalpel (as knife) | First aid kit (two uses- restores 1d4 HP) |
37 | Exterminator | Crowbar (as club) | Canister of toxic gas and sprayer |
38 | Farmer | Pitchfork | Pack of seeds and a hen |
39 | Fireman | Fire axe (two-handed) | Fire hat and protective suit (ignore 1 point of fire damage) |
40 | Fisherman | Butchering knife | Fishing pole and three fish hooks |
41 | Florist | Large scissors (as knife) | Glass vase and bouquet of fake flowers |
42 | Fry Cook | Frying pan (as club) | Can of cooking oil, bottle of ketchup and mustard |
43 | Gem Cutter | Chisel (as knife) | Fine gem |
44 | Golf Caddy | 1d4 Golf clubs (as club) | Caddy cart and 10 golf balls |
45 | Grocery Store Checker | Pocket knife | Backpack, box of granola bars |
46 | Health Inspector | Heavy briefcase (as two-handed club) | Clip board with notes |
47 | Herbalist | Trowel (as knife) | Packet of chamomile and packet of sage |
48 | High School Student4 | Large text book (as club) | Item that makes sense for rolled student |
49 | Hiker | Staff | Backpack, 1d4 MREs, 1 canteen |
50 | Home Décor Designer | Rubber mallet (as club) | Book of wall paper and carpet samples and measuring tape |
51 | Housekeeper | Thick scrubbing brush with wrist-tie handle (as flail) | Cleaning uniform and bottle of disinfectant |
52 | Hunter | Hunting rifle (1d8 damage) | 50 bullets, bear spray |
53 | IT Specialist | Limited Edition “Rambo” knife | Laptop with loads of porn |
54 | Judge | Gavel (as club) | Book of history of the French Revolution, impressive black “JUDGE” robes |
55 | Lab Tech | 2d4+1 samples of gross stuff (random effects) | Large clump of dry ice, small cooler |
56 | Lawyer | Cane (as club) | Lighter, fancy watch, and designer suit |
57 | Leatherworker | Large tongs (as club) | Leather armor made for Ren Fair (+2 AC) |
58 | Loan Shark | Brass knuckles | 1d100 + 20 dollars and a flashy cell phone |
59 | Mason | Pointing trowel (as knife) | Bag of 1d6 artisan crafted bricks |
60 | Mechanic | Large monkey wrench (as club) | Spark plugs, liter of 40W motor oil |
61 | Medium | Ceremonial blade | Book of spiritual signs and book of current year’s horoscopes |
62 | Metal Worker | Thick metal tongs (as club) | Large chunk of metal |
63 | Meteorologist | Rock collection (10 rocks- as sling) | A collection of “moon” rocks and “Forecasting Weather for Dummies” |
64 | Military Personnel | Assault rifle (1d10 damage) | 50 bullets, army fatigues |
65 | Model | Small pistol (1d4 damage) | 8 bullets, super sexy outfit, fancy shoes |
66 | Mortician | Hacksaw (as knife) | Embalming fluid sample, measuring tape, blood-resistant apron |
67 | Motel Clerk | Shotgun (1d8 damage) | 6 shots, book of strange occurrences across USA, flask with vodka |
68 | Musician7 | Knife | Musical instrument of rolled musician |
69 | Optician | Iron (as club) | Great pair of designer glasses, traveling eye exam kit |
70 | Performer8 | Item that makes sense for rolled performer | Item that makes sense for rolled performer |
71 | Photographer | Tripod (as club) | Camera and camera bag |
72 | Physician | Expensive stethoscope (as garrote- 1d4 damage) | Pain killers and booze |
73 | Pilot | Flare gun (4 shots, 1d4 damage) | Aviator sunglasses, pilots cap |
74 | Plumber | Large monkey wrench (as club) | Galoshes and water-resistant pants |
75 | Police Officer | Pistol (1d6 damage) | Handcuffs and badge |
76 | Post Person (Mail) | Taser (as sling) | Binder of undelivered love letters |
77 | Private Investigator | Revolver (1d6 damage) | Cool trench coat, pack of smokes, lighter |
78 | Psychologist | Briefcase (as club) | Hawaiian shirt and swimming trunks |
79 | Radio DJ | Book of cds (1d100 cds- as sling) | Headphones and old discman |
80 | Registered Nurse | Taser (as sling) | First aid kit (two uses- restores 1d4 HP) |
81 | Religious Leader/Occultist | Silver dagger | Religious symbol and holy book |
82 | Restaurant Owner | Pizza cutter (as knife) | 1d100 dollars golden ring with tiny diamonds |
83 | Sailor | Butcher hook (as knife) | Compass and HAM |
84 | Salesperson | Heavy, large sales catalog (as club) | Large suitcase with fine jewelry |
85 | Salvager | Shotgun (1d8 damage) | Map to location of lost WWII plane, compass |
86 | Secretary | Letter opener (as knife) | Fun summer clothing, nice watch |
87 | Security Guard | Collapsible baton | Pepper spray |
88 | Singer9 | Knife | 3d20 dollars and a book of new songs based on rolled genre |
89 | Social Worker | Keychain self-defense weapon (1d4 damage) | Professional clothing, comfortable shoes |
90 | Store Stocker | Canvas bag filled with canned goods (as club) | 10+1d10 canned goods and a roll of quarters ($10- for laundry) |
91 | Tailor | Scissors (as knife) | Sewing kit, 3 sets of clothing |
92 | Teacher10 | Collapsible baton | Text book on rolled subject and a stress ball |
93 | Train Conductor | Crudgel | Pocket watch and whistle |
94 | Treasure Hunter | Pistol (1d6 damage) | 25 bullets and tent and map |
95 | Tree Trimmer | Pruning sheers (as knife) | Book on tree identification and cultivation |
96 | Vagrant | Swiss Army knife | Candy bar, |
97 | Valet | Keychain self-defense weapon (1d4 damage) | Nice cell phone, designer sneakers |
98 | Veterinarian | Scalpel (as knife) | Pain killers, medium sized dog |
99 | Waiter | Taser (as sling) | Nice clothing and fanny pack |
100 | Writer11 | Bottle of booze (as club) | Laptop and carrying case |
- Academic (roll 1d8): 1) Biologist; 2) Chemist; 3) Physicist; 4) Philosophy; 5) Mythology/theology; 6) Historian; 7) Political science; 8) Geology
- Artist (roll 1d6): 1) Jeweler; 2) Potter; 3) Painter; 4) Sculpture; 5) Illustrator; 6) Architecture
- Athlete (roll 1d8): 1) Mountain Climbing; 2) Boxing; 3) Wrestling; 4) Track and Field; 5) Hockey; 6) Football; 7) Baseball; 8) Basketball
- College/High School Student– Main area of study/interest– (roll 1d10): 1) Drama; 2) History; 3) Mathematics; 4) Political Science; 5) Culinary Arts; 7) Being Popular; 8) Computers; Chemistry; 9) Astronomy; 10) Band/Choir
- Conservationist– type of environment interested in– (roll 1d8): 1) Wetlands; 2) Farmlands; 3) Desert; 4) Arctic; 5) Forests; 6) Tundra; 7) Ocean; 8) Prairie
- Criminal Element (roll 1d8): 1) Thug; 2) Gangbanger; 3) Debt Collector; 4) Body Guard; 5) Fence; 6) Counterfeiter; 7) Information Extractor; 8) Prostitute
- Musician (roll 1d8): 1) Guitar; 2) Drums; 3) Tuba; 4) Trumpet; 5) Bass; 6) Flute; 7) Clarinet; 8) Cow Bell
- Performer (roll 1d8): 1) Spoken Word; 2) Mime; 3) Puppetry; 4) Freak Show; 5) Dancer (i.e., jazz/tap, ballet, swing, break, interpretive, stripper, etc.); 6) Magician; 7) Juggler; 8) Hula Hooper
- Singer (roll 1d8): 1) Country; 2) Jazz; 3) Rock; 4) Metal; 5) Rap; 6) Pop; 7) New Wave; 8) Lounge singer
- Teacher (roll 1d8): 1) English; 2) History; 3) Social Studies; 4) Mathematics; 5) Earth Science; 6) Physical Education; 7) Band; 8) Cooking and Home Economics
- Writer (roll 1d8): 1) Horror; 2) Poetry; 3) Plays; 4) Fantasy/Sci-Fi; 5) Reference Manuals; 6) Children’s Books; 7) Mysteries; 8) Magazine Editorials/Journalist

2 thoughts